Notes on Love: Being Single and Dating in a Marriage Obsessed Church (Paperback)
  • Notes on Love: Being Single and Dating in a Marriage Obsessed Church (Paperback)

Notes on Love: Being Single and Dating in a Marriage Obsessed Church (Paperback)

Paperback 200 Pages
Published: 15/07/2021
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In this delightfully witty and uplifting book, thirty-something Lauren Windle shines a light on the trials and tribulations - and sometimes also the triumphs - of the world of Christian dating.

This is not a how-to guide.

Like having a coffee with your mates while you pore over your profile matches, heartbreaks and hilarious mishaps, Notes on Love draws on Lauren's own experiences of being single and dating in the Church to offer a funny, insightful and open-hearted collection of musings on the absurdity, messiness, pain and joy of it all.

With notes on 'How to first date' and 'A million ways to meet people' to 'Disappointment' and 'Schrodinger's boyfriend', as well as looking at how you can find true love with yourself, your friends and family and above all in Christ, Notes on Love is a thought-provoking exploration of Christian relationships in the Church today.

This is a book for anyone who has struggled with dating in Church, or who has asked themselves how to be single as a Christian only to discover there's no right answer. Warm, generous and honest, Notes on Love is an invitation to laugh, cry and know that whether you are male or female, single, coupled up or somewhere in between, you are not alone.

Publisher: SPCK Publishing
ISBN: 9780281085552
Number of pages: 200
Weight: 212 g
Dimensions: 198 x 129 mm


‘This is a book on singleness today, written with honesty and skill, that is, by turns, wonderfully insightful, uncomfortably challenging and hilariously amusing. If you are single or in any way involved with single people, this is a deeply helpful and inspiring resource. Well done, Lauren!’ - J John

‘The wider conversation about how church leaders and church communities view marital status is overdue. Marriage has long been held up as the gold standard, with anything else falling short. Lauren Windle offers a window into the world of singleness in church culture, and this book is a helpful tool for leaders and the wider church community to begin to see someone's marital status through their own eyes and lens, which may or may not put marriage on a pedestal.’ - Genelle Aldred, journalist and communications strategist

‘Lauren cuts through all the standard Christian fluff and stock phrases with her honesty, wisdom and sharp humour. She blends experience, studies and scripture to reframe the way the Church needs to approach singleness. This book is practical and insightful. It’s warm and witty but packs a punch.’ - Jon Brown, speaker, writer and part of the leadership team, New Community Church, Sidcup

‘Honest, pithy and relatable. Lauren has written a much needed anthem for a generation of lost single people in the Church.’ - Tola Doll Fisher, Editor of Woman Alive, author and speaker

‘Lauren’s Notes on Love provides a fresh perspective on the challenges that single Christians face. Whether you are dating, looking to date or wanting to stay single, Lauren combines great straightforward advice and amusing, uplifting anecdotes based on her own experiences, together with research gathered from published sources, such as the "Single Living" survey, conducted by Single Friendly Church. Many churches in the UK don’t focus on their single members and if anyone is struggling with being a single Christian, then this book explains how you can learn to understand and value your worth as a single person, whether or not you are looking to be in a relationship. Through weaving in and analysing relevant biblical references, Lauren helps to provide a framework for single people of all ages and stages.’ - Amelia Gosal, Executive Director, Single Friendly Church

‘Lauren writes with disarming humour, courage and passion, and I believe Notes on Love will connect with a whole generation of single Christian people. A heartfelt wake-up call to the real challenges facing single Christian people today. Notes on Love is both a reality check and a road map to something better.’ - Revd Will Van Der Hart, St Dionis, Parsons Green, London, author, speaker and Director, The Mind & Soul Foundation

‘I wish I’d had this book years ago. I couldn’t put it down. Largely because it’s hilarious and brilliantly written, but also because of how boldly it addresses the complex and often stigmatic topic of navigating dating and relationships in the Church – particularly as a woman. Regardless of your gender or relationship status, you need to read this book and take serious note of Lauren’s insights and sage advice. She is a pioneer and I can’t recommend Notes On Love enough!’ - Persia Lawson, author, speaker, love coach

‘She’s sharp, she’s honest, she’s observant, she’s unique and she’s something that the Church might have been missing on this particular topic until Lauren came along – she’s fun. An insightful, brutal and bold stance that any girl facing the fabulous single journey in the hoi polloi of the Christian dating world may need. A breath of fresh air – and a much needed one. - Carrie Lloyd, author, pastor, podcaster

‘Notes on Love provides fantastic insight and wise and witty advice, not just about dating in a digital age but also about building healthy relationships more generally. If you have friends or even kids of dating age who are fed up with "helpful advice" from you or others who don’t have a clue, this book would be the perfect gift.’ - Cathy Madavan, author and speaker

‘Rebranding dating in the Church is no small order, but Lauren has done so in style. Notes on Love is fabulously unchurchy! Dating apps, expectations, break-ups and much more, Lauren shares experiences of her own and others with humour, wisdom and masses of practical advice. She highlights the negatives and downright toxic, while also reminding the reader of good biblical foundations and their identity in Christ. As someone who has been married a while, I found lots in the book really helpful in terms of relationships generally, and in recognizing the contemporary challenges of those who are single in the Church. Funny, relevant and informative – what’s not to like?!’ - Revd Jules Middleton, vicar and author

‘Once in a while, a new voice comes along, someone who really has something to say. In a world of well-meaning advice about love and relationships, Lauren is like that trusted friend who tells you the whole truth and nothing but the truth – and you’ll love her for it. Notes on Love is kind, thoughtful, wise and pretty much relentlessly hilarious – there’s a decent joke on almost every page. Everyone needs a friend like Lauren.’ - Martin Saunders, author, Director of Innovation, Youthscape, and Director, Satellites

‘Beautiful read! The topic of singleness in the Church is one that’s not often talked about and, when it is, it is often from a view of incompleteness and inferiority. This needs to change. Lauren talks about this topic with the seriousness it deserves, with humour sprinkled throughout. Her tips, anecdotes, research, call for a better "way to community" and prayers are a wonderful addition. I wish someone had given me this book as a reminder to enjoy every season in life and not miss the beauty in it all.’ - Corina Straub, photographer and Editor of Chapel

‘Raw, hilarious and painfully observant, this impassioned plea to treat single people as people should be required reading for all Christians. Full of stories and research, Notes on Love will reshape its readers’ perceptions and, hopefully – let’s dream big – the Church. Lauren, you are a star and I can’t begin to understand why you are single (as I might have said before reading your book).’ - Jo Swinney, author and speaker

‘Lauren’s book was an amazing read – full of honesty, with a realness to it. I used to read a fair few dating books growing up but most of them shamed me in my thinking. I wish I had, had this book back then! It is written in a non-judgemental, honest way, and you will laugh, cry, feel a sense of relief and gain so much from this book. I will definitely be recommending this to people!’ - Hope Virgo, multi-award-winning mental health campaigner and author

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